There are a lot of discussions and solutions as to how to help men dating and have sex with women all around the Internet because there is huge profit to be made in this line of business. In reality, however, dating and having sex with hot chicks is the easy part! The real challenge comes next, when she decides to move in!
Why is that so? Simply because we are slowly moving away from entertainment-centred relationships to a more boring daily-routine-centred relationship.
When you date a woman, you only see her when she is at her best: all dressed up, sexy, in a good mood with nice hair and make-up. When you hang out with her, it is to have fun.
Everything is fun when you “date”, and all your problems seem to disappear during that specific span of time. It’s play time!
But when she lives with you, it is the morning routine that causes the greatest pain in the ass: cooking the food, doing the chores, working a fucking job, being tired, stressed out or sick all the time. You even have to deal with daily issues, crazy family problems and the constant headache that goes with paying the bills, etc… It is a complete emotional mess.
Basically, the focus of the relationship slowly shifts from fun to boring because you always have a duty to take care of the unpleasant responsibilities in the most efficient way.
I am sure you have one of those buddies who once declared himself to be a complete loser in a relationship, a relationship that was slowly eating away at him, draining the life out of him. He must have been filled you in on how he thinks women are way better at creating drama out of thin air and that it is virtually impossible to match them on a one-on-one conversation.
Think about it!
It’s a beautiful summer day, a cheeseburger in one hand, a beer in the other; my new bow is ready to shoot a few flaming arrows, it’s peace, just enjoying fresh air and sunshine and ,out of nowhere, as if a GBU just hit my compound…
Woman yelling, crying, screaming and bitching!!!!
A crazy situation just detonated and let me guess? It is entirely my fault!
No matter what the situation is, you are always somehow responsible. There is no need to take it personally but it’s your fault, and it’s always going to be.
Why? Simply because she is right and you’re wrong.
But, wait a minute, everything was cool! I haven’t even used the bow yet!!
I just finished solving a dozen problems, everything is rolling smoothly, and suddenly, out of nowhere, there is some sort of apocalyptic crisis collapsing down on my head again!
What the hell is going on here for God’s sakes?
Fortunately, it’s all fine; no need get aggravated for that one. It’s only a “JAD”! (Just Another Drama)
I can indeed finish my burger and shoot a couple of arrows before having to deal with the situation.
Drama is only the symptom
Your fault or not, something you did or did not do, the actual problem in that particular situation is most likely to not be the real cause of the drama which is in fact caused by some behind-the-scenes stuff you are not even aware of.
Basically, it’s only a bullshit reason to create drama!
That’s why it is totally inadequate to only address that specific issue.
The real reason why women create drama usually falls into one or both of the following two categories:
I know society tell us that women are more mature than men and that that would be why they usually date older men.
Come on guys, you’re not buying that bull-shit, are you?
The reason why they date older men is because they are more confident, dominant, rich, powerful etc… It has nothing to do with maturity! Otherwise, bad boys would have great trouble finding a girlfriend, right?
It’s simply, because they are big babies constantly whining and bitching about everything!
The exact same way a 3-year old would do, women would create random drama scenarios out of thin air because they want more attention.
They are getting bored!
It is easy to realize how the relationship and lifestyle in which women were the actual instigators, such as settling down, getting married, getting more serious, is actually the reason why they are so bored and thus willing to cause drama all the time.
Of course, it’s boring, because there is no more intrigue, mystery, sudden refusal, challenge, competition, novelty, discovery, experience… Nothing remains from the old flames.
That is what SHE wanted, isn’t it?
But instead of sucking it up like we do, they throw tantrum all around!
Like I already said before, women experience life in an emotionally-driven realm. By creating drama, they create great emotional fluctuations, which basically make things even more interesting for them.
They need to experience different kinds of intense emotions to be happy, but the mundane routine of a serious long-term relationship generally produces quite the opposite.
Drama, just like in their favourite TV shows, spices things up!
It provides the emotional variety that they crave so much! And since everything else in their life is getting more and more boring, because their ultimate goal is to “settle down” or be “more serious”, they develop an addiction to drama.
That’s what “society” calls maturity, my friends.
One of the characteristics of any normal, feminine and sane woman is to feel insecure about many different aspects of her life. This is one of the main reasons why she is attracted to strong and confident man that can provide “security” in the first place.
Because of that, women cannot help themselves but test men’s emotional strength, capacity to stay in control and confidence at all times. The reason for that is because they are not only insecure about their own capacity but also about yours!
Even if you’re in a long term relationship, they will always continue to test you. In order to do that, they will use bitchy comments, criticism and even insult to reach their objectives. In other words, they create drama and chaos with the goal of making you lose control.
By doing that, they can establish pretty well how strong you are, how much you care for them and where you stand confidence-wise.
Also, on the topic of insecurity, the presence of other hot women in your reach will eventually be another reason to create drama.
Remember that at subconscious level women want to fall and surrender for a strong man who will protect them. You have to understand that their natural self-doubt remains a constant player because it is this doubt that will always motivate them to verify that you are still the one and only player in the field.
What to do about it?
The best fundamental strategy would be to create random phases of excitement while displaying consistently strong confidence. Although it is probably impossible to totally prevent drama, it can be minimised and controlled that way. Once in a while, it is ok to have a little drama if necessary. You can even play the game with her if she is reasonable.
What’s important is not to reward it, because it could quickly become an addiction. Don’t give her a gift, apologize too much or use any other form of ass-kissing routine for the sake of ending the drama session quickly.
Stay cool, just chill the fuck out!
When it happens again, try to find out which category this drama session falls into by listening and observing. Analyse if this drama is part of a bigger sequence of dramatic events or just the usual whining crap.
By doing that and relying on focused logic, these practices will prevent you from being emotionally involved in the drama itself, which would only give birth to more in the long run.
Listen to her and find out what the decoy problem is; acknowledge it while keeping in mind the real reason behind it.
Stay cool; try to shift the frame on another strong emotion with humour or, better yet, try to make her talk about her feelings… This one is a great bait!
If it gets to the crazy stage, just leave
If this goes on and on, stay cool and in control of yourself. At one point, you have to stand up, draw the line and walk away.
Hey, listen warrior princess! You made your point, but now it’s time to let it go! I’m going to pop a couple of Advil and leave; I will be back in an hour. Bye bye!
If it’s getting regular, take control and change the beat
If it happens too often, for example once or twice a day, she is probably addicted to the emotional rush provided by the drama session, and she is probably very bored / unhappy.
This will most likely destroy the relationship sooner or later while making you miserable in the process.
It’s time to change the beat!
Find a way to make your lives more exciting. Go crazy for a while, try new stuff, maybe wear new style, be more spontaneous, more dominant, change the routine and seek adventures!
Adventure is exciting, which is the opposite of boring!
Meet new friends! Take on a challenge or plan a trip with her.
If you’re not married or have kids with her, consider the possibility to make her part of the change or get a second girlfriend! She likes drama? That would surely spice things up!
In relationships, like any other things in life, it’s good to cycle:
Involve her into relationship improvement
If you can convince her to be proactive in the improvement of your relationship that would be a great move. Being more implicated, putting time and energy by herself to improve things with you, she will be way more incline to drop counter productive behavior.
You could introduce her to a classic book on the subject, with a lot of credential, written by an expert, that could certainly make her realize by herself that nagging, complaining and whining all the time is definitively not something good for her relationship with you, or with any other men for that matter.
For that, I suggest you get Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires, The Respect He Desperately Needs by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs, M.A, B.A, PhD, (all the necessary creds), also available in Audio, and propose her that you should both read that great book in order to improve the quality of your relationship.
That, both of you could be happier has a result. You can frame it as it was your initiative at first, because you desire to become a better partner, but only to realized that this would be even better if you both did it!
Anyway, it worth the shot, we never know she could have an epiphany and stop trowing tantrum all the time! Personally I got a good 6 month of peace and a general improvement in the relationship with that one.
Got to be creative …
Unfortunately, there is no specific technique that would work all the time, and women usually mean drama. It’s part of relationship, it’s part of life, but the idea is to smooth this out a little bit…
I will be very glad to read the ruses and technique you use effectively to manage her drama in the comments box below.
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