Whether you’re a good guy or not, inevitably people with conflicting interests will play games with you no matter if you’re at school, in a corporate environment or running a business. Some people will take direct or indirect actions against your greatest interests in order to advance their own agenda.
Those actions can have negative consequences on your financial pursuits, career, business, health, family, etc. That’s why it is important to deal with these issues appropriately.
Here is what you have to keep in mind when you deal with enemies:
The best defence is offence! Become a badass social warlord!
Being moderate, kind and indulgent is perceived to be a weakness by the majority of people and will most likely attract bullies just like shit attracts flies. The worst thing you can do when dealing with your enemy is to be the “nice guy” and play a defensive game or focusing your efforts on damage control. In doing so you’re painting a big crosshair on your back. Not only your enemies will increase the frequency of their attacks in order to suck you dry, but others will join the party as well, and they will do all this just because you’re an easy target.
A lot of those small enemies act like scavengers; they just wait until someone is under attack and only then they take the opportunity to put a little meat under their tooth. Those are usually easy to scare and better to do it sooner than later. They are just parasites sucking energy that you could otherwise use against bigger threats.
In life you get what you tolerate!
As soon as you find out someone is playing games against you,
Declare War on Him
The first strike is not a warning; it’s a real strike that should inflict real damage.
The message must be clear: YOU ARE NOW AT WAR!
It has to become apparent for everyone that fighting you will have high costs and an even bitter taste! This is very dissuasive and will greatly reduce your enemies’ ranks by at the same time exponentially increasing the number of your allies.
Hit everything that is weak and avoid what is strong
Take a little time to figure out what the strengths and weaknesses of your enemies are. When you strike, never do a “frontal” move because it’s only going to solidify his guard and you’re most likely to hit something strong which will produce less damage to your opponent but result in even more cost to you. This is a common mistake!
Like Sun Tzu wrote in The Art of War : “All warfare is based on deception”.
This is exactly how Vietnam kicked the ass of the US in the 60’s
You need to work your way to the flanks and hit one of his weaknesses. Fighting on a ground where your enemy is strong will cost you more and will only give him advantage over you.
Always bring the fight where your enemy his weak.
Make your strength look like weakness and your weakness look like strength.
Well, your enemy will most likely try to target your weakest point; like you just did! That’s why you need to use deception to camouflage your weaknesses and make them look like your strongest characteristics. The purpose of this is, of course, to manipulate your enemy into bringing the confrontation to you on a ground where you’re at your best while preventing them to hit you where you could suffer the greatest damage. Because it is his idea, his strategy, his arrogance, it will blind him from seeing crucial mistakes in his actions and decisions.
Unfortunately, your enemy could already know your weakness. In that situation you can still try to lure him to hit elsewhere by creating some sort of decoy, like letting some rumor drift around about a certain flaw of yours.
But it is far better, knowing that an attack is likely to come from that angle, to set him up. This is the perfect opportunity to play a preventive move and to setup a deadly trap and wait for your enemy to fall into it!
Let your plans be dark and impenetrable as night, and when you move, fall like a thunderbolt.
I had some very good success with this method when fighting my ex-psycho-wife when she turned on me and tried to rip me off of my possessions. She had the advantage of a surprise attack; she was all prepared and knew me very well; yet at the end she was begging me for a honest arrangement. Unfortunately for her, she failed to understand the aforementioned classic strategy.
Nurture genuine relationships with your allies
This is long-term, ongoing and essential. This is social warfare! Having a network of allies is crucial to prevent problems or deal with enemies for that matter! It’s is also practical to have at least one crazy son of a bitch on your payroll! From time to time it is convenient to have a friend like that!
Nothing will shock your enemy more than a coordinated attack coming from multiple angles! This is very powerful and could very likely end the war in your favor a lot quicker, but in order to orchestrate something like that you need some very trustworthy allies that have congruent interests with yours.
Having genuine emphatic relationships with your allies will give you the opportunity to understand their real goals, motivations and who their real friends are. Consequently, this will also allow you to have a good understanding of the socio-political layout of your environment.
This is crucial because if you happen to need their help during a conflict, you better be 100% sure that their agenda doesn’t conflict with yours on certain matters, otherwise they will most likely play a double game and could leak some strategic pieces of information to your enemy. This could be catastrophic if not fatal. This happens all the time!
I could have written a nice and positive post about how “being nice” and “win-win relationships” are the keys to avoiding conflicts, but if I want to be honest, my experience tells me that if you want peace, YOU HAVE to kick some ass first!
When it comes to war strategy my favorite book is The 33 Strategies of War by Robert Greene. It’s clear and direct to the point. Of course, I also like The Art of War by Sun Tzu, which is the ultimate classic on war strategy but I found that is more difficult to read, since it has been written in china more than 2000 year ago, you have to “decode” and think about it to see the modern application. Still a great book but Robert Greene makes it just more practical to read. Also available in audio!
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