It is of primary importance to build our self-confidence as strong and deep as we possibly can, because it is intimately related to all great things that will happen in our life. It is not only the most powerful aphrodisiac that exists to attract women but it is also the most important factor that will determine our level of success in about everything we take part in life.
There is a strong relationship between confidence, our taught patterns, the words we use when we speak, our body language, our hormone levels and even in our epigenome. It is all interconnected. In a previous post called “Badass body language,” I have underlined the fact that you can increase your self-confidence and affect everything else simply by changing your body language.
Now, I want to expose another strategy, another angle that can be used to boost confidence level following on the same line of ideas.
When you look at the “confidence” chain of interconnected patterns, you can also observe a similar pattern which is at the other end of the spectrum, an anti-confidence pattern if you wish.
High Testosterone & lower cortisol
Easy to build muscle mass
Relaxed and open body language
In control, take action
Socially at ease
Doesn’t fear conflict
High Cortisol & lower testosterone
Difficult to build muscle mass
Nervous and closed body language
Over analyse, lack of action
Avoid conflicts at all costs
The Beta pattern rules by the state of being naturally nervous, which further creates elusive anxiety patterns all over the place without you necessarily noticing it at the present moment. If you could just reduce the intensity of your hyper-active nervous system, you would naturally get calmer and it would be way easier for you to just slide into the Alpha patterns.
I have noticed that in certain months of the year, in certain phases of my diet, or when I consume certain products, I would become less social and my speech would become less fluid. I would develop some sort of a light social anxiety. It would also coincide with the lack of strength in the gym and the rise of other Beta male traits.
Being nervous or anxious, are the results of many things which we can take action on, for example, nutrition, drugs, activities and sleep.
Here are some tactics you can do to just get calmer and more prone to Alpha behaviours that will help in your quest for attaining a deeper self-confidence.
The first thing you should do, if you want to stay cool, is stop taking stimulants every fucking day!
But I cannot work without my coffee! I already hear you whining …
The things is, if you take coffee or any another stimulant almost every day your body has adapted to the situation and has reduced its “normal speed” to regain balance with your coffee consumption.
Having said that, you now have to drink coffee to be normal, otherwise you would have trouble waking up. You would also be both less sharp and much less productive as a result.
The reality is, caffeine and other stimulants will make you more nervous in general and will affect the quality of your sleep, and they do all that without making you more productive in the long run.
Caffeine, amphetamine, ephedrine, and many others are things that are good to use in special occasions, but not every day!
Stopping your favorite stimulant will produce symptoms of withdrawal for about 2 to 4 weeks. These include lack of energy and willpower with frequent headaches in the first week. But once it’s done, you will be as much productive as before, without the “nervousness” side-effects.
Once in a while, for special opportunity, like an interview, a test, or a business meeting then your coffee will give you the desired advantage.
Use nutritional supplements
Magnesium has a calming effect on the nervous system. It improves sleep quality and helps to reduce stress in general. Strangely, supplementation in magnesium is also proven to reduce cortisol and increase testosterone levels.
Isn’t it cool? Two birds with one stone!
According to the National Institute of Health, magnesium in our food supplies has significantly decreased over the past few decades and now approximatively 70% of the U.S population is magnesium deficient. What about you? Personally, I take one 500mg capsule every day.
The amino L-Taurine which is used in bodybuilding supplements mainly because it helps you recover faster, burn fat and boost testosterone levels while also having a nice calming effect on the nervous system and brain function. That’s why it is also an ingredient in most popular energy drinks. It is used to chop the edge of a very high dose of caffeine; that way you would not start shaking and feeling weird. Used daily with magnesium, 1500mg, taurine is a good supplement that will keep the stress away.
By the way, an interesting fact about Taurine is that people from the Japanese island of Okinawa, where the highest life expectancy in the world has been documented, consumes high levels of Taurine in their diet, and scientists believe it is one of the main factors that would contribute to their longevity.
Pretty cool, huh?
5-HTP is a compound made from the seeds of a plant called Griffonia simplicifolia, and it provides the necessary building blocks for your body to produce the neurotransmitter called serotonin. Serotonin is a very important chemical that is responsible for maintaining mood balance. When your levels of serotonin are getting low, nervousness, anxiety and depression kick in. I like to use 5-HTP in low dose when needed. If you feel overly stressed, if your mind goes hyper-active, or if some weird nervousness creeps up on you, 5-HTP is definitely the way to go. You just pop one or two tablets (100mg), and everything will slowly go back to a normal in a healthy way without any side effects!
It is a pretty fucking useful tool if you’re going through some tough time. It is also awesome to just take some before going to bed for the sake of a good night’s sleep. The mere fact of a good night’s rest will help you battle depression a whole lot easier.
Have you noticed that when you drink quality green tea, you feel a little caffeine boost but in a more peaceful and calm way than with coffee? It’s because, beside caffeine, green tea contains the amino acid L-Theanine. This one is very cool too because it promotes a subtle calming effect that allows you to relax but still stay alert. It is non-addictive with no side effects, and used occasionally, 100mg to 200mg, is a nice and smooth supplement that can be used by any nervous guy to just to chill the fuck out.
A vitamin-B kind of compound, inositol, is very effective to reduce general anxiety. I experienced it a couple of times, -3 times 250mg a day-, and I felt a very addictive surge of self-confidence! I have surely kicked more ass those days due to my inhibited tolerance to stupid people, and I also had a general feeling of fearlessness; it was awesome! Unfortunately, I’m part of those rare unlucky guys who get headaches from it so I stopped using it. But it seems that it is very safe to use and side-effect-free for most people.
Physical fun entails any kind of sports or physical activities with friends that you enjoy a lot. Some sunshine, fresh air, a couple of friends playing together while joking around will go a long way in killing stress and anxiety!
It’s going to release endorphin that will relax your mind, reduce cortisol and will set you for a good restorative night of sleep. Of course, naughty bedroom action certainly does the same effect, but I suggest you should not be dependent on women to feel good.
I know that in our fast-paced life some of us don’t have much time anymore to have this kind of fun, but since it helps to keep you healthy, happy, and stress-free, I think it deserves some priority and an appropriate spot in your schedule.
Meditation and brainwave entrainment
Of course, it is well known that taking a few minutes to meditate every day will calm your nerves down. The reason is because by sitting in a quiet place, closing your eyes and focusing on your breath only, you will downgrade your brainwave speed to what they call “Alpha” (pure coincidence or maybe not) which is between 7.5 and 12.5 Hz. It also happens that when your brain operates at that speed, it is when autosuggestion, visualisation, NPL and most mind-reprogramming techniques will have the greatest impact.
If it’s not your style, you can also listen to an audio track that has brainwave entrainment. It means that there is a pattern inserted in a sound track that will slowly reduce speed, thus entraining your brain in the desired range. There are many of those tracks available on YouTube for free. Personally, I got this cool software that allow you to custom build brainwave entrainment tracks you like, and you can also insert your own suggestion directives to reprogram yourself; it’s very sweet, isn’t it? You can get the Neuro-Programmer here.
There are a lot of other things that can help get you smoother, and consequently, help with your confidence, muscle building, testosterone levels and body language. For example, stop listening to bad news on TV every evening, introduce a regular sleep pattern, take your Omega-3, exercise 2 to 3 times a week. Even if these practices don’t have an immediate perceptible effect on you, doing them all should produce results over a long period of time.
This article was not only about giving you tips and tools on how to stay in good mode, chill-out and be cooler, but it was really about underlining the link between the “hyper-active / nervousness / anxiety” kind of lifestyle patterns and your self-confidence level.
After all, why do you think “being cool” is such an important factor to determine your social value and what it really means to be cool?
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